then reality breaks and stupidity sets in.kcrit42qReport 2012-10-04 23:34:29it was good but needs workanonymous readerReport 2012-10-04 23:08:13No. Keep writing, writing a great story comes from practicing your craft thru writing many stories. Tamil xxx The basic premise of the story is actually decent. But I didn’t like your story because you rushed right into sex, and rushed thru it. then reality breaks and stupidity sets in.kcrit42qReport 2012-10-04 23:34:29it was good but needs workanonymous readerReport 2012-10-04 23:08:13No. THAT is how you draw people into your story.. The basic premise of the story is actually decent. Keep writing, writing a great story comes from practicing your craft thru writing many stories. Pay attention to my criticism. Keep writing, writing a great story comes from practicing your craft thru writing many stories. My aim is to make you better.
